Impossible? Not for Him it isn't

I couldn't sleep. No matter how hard I tried, my mind would wander somewhere else, no specific place, just that my mind won't rest. So I decided to surf the internet, check my mails, and visit my blog (which I don't often do). I really am lazy when it comes to writing but at this hour, I feel like unloading my thoughts, so here I am.

I thought of something that I would write about, and suddenly, I remembered that I had to write about this certain topic; how God, again, has shown that He is a God of the impossible.

I went to Manila on August 24 to 28, 2009 to attend a seminar on fumigation, something that had to do with our family business. I wasn't that interested, and admittedly, it wasn't actually one of the things I am very eager to learn (since it involves math, computation, science, chemistry and the like, I think you get what I mean). I spent the entire week listening and trying to cope up with the things taught to us at the seminar. At the end of the week, we were to take an exam to measure what we have learned and to check if we are eligible to be a licensed fumigator. I had information overload since there were a lot of topics discussed, topics that were too foreign for me since it was just at the seminar that I learned about the backgrounds of my co-participants, of which are just the opposite of what my course was: almost all the participants were graduates of BS Chemistry, Engineering, and a lot of them were already working for a government organization or already practicioners of Pest control science.

Despite my difficulty in absorbing everything, I tried my very best, always studying and practicing the computation exercises given to us during the lessons, and believe me, the computation part almost made my nose bleed. Not only that, we had to memorize tons of scientific names of insects of which the common names I haven't even heard of.

At the end of the week, we took the exam. I kept on praying, not just to pass the exam but for God to make my heart accept whatever the result was, may it be good or bad, and for me to still acknowledge His goodness despite the negative result. I also informed my mom of the slim chances of passing the exam since I wasn't very good at the computation exercises, and that made up 70% of the items. During the exam, we were given different sets of questions by my seatmates and were also given seating arrangements to ensure no cheating would take place. Upon seeing the questions, none of them were from the quizzes they gave us during the entire seminar. All the terms were unfamiliar, although I tried answering each of the items and made sure that I didn't miss a single item to improve my chances of having correct answers. Miraculously, I was able to answer each of the items (although I wasn't sure if those were correct answers). Then came the computation, my brain must have slept at that time because my mind completely went blank. I was too nervous that I forgot the formula I had to use and the way to compute the answers. I was also concerned about the time since the proctor kept on reminding us what little time we have left in finishing the exam. After that, what I remember was that I just answered everything without knowing if it was the correct way of doing it. What I made sure of was that I didn't leave any blank unanswered.

After that, I never cared to say goodbye to the people I was able to befriend at the seminar. I was too ashamed to be asked what my answers were and sped right off to go home. While going out of the building, I felt I was floating. I thought about what my mom would say and the expenses that were incurred because of the seminar. The registration fee was already at 8,000 pesos and that did not yet include the airfare, food and other expenses while staying in Manila for a week. Thank goodness one of my bestfriends let me stay at her place for the duration of the seminar.

While at the LRT, I sent an sms to my elder sister telling her of how I felt. It was the first time I ever felt that way because it was the first exam I took which wasn't in line with my skills nor my experience. The organizers said the results of the exam would come out after two months. I didn't bother to wait. I already knew the result.I prepared the speech I was to give to my mother upon arriving home.

Along came September, November, then December. I already forgot all about the exam which I took. 2010 has begun. No letter whatsoever from the Fertilizer and Pesticides Authority, not even one stating that I failed or that I was to take a removal. I prepared myself for the worst that was to come. I knew it.

Then there was a call from my mom just this week. She said they got a letter. She read to me the content of the letter. Her tone of voice was nothing out of the ordinary. By the time that she finished reading the letter, that was when I knew that it was the one we have been waiting for, and it wasn't the result I was expecting. Mama said I passed the exam. I couldn't believe my ears. I literally jumped up and down out of excitement and was just too ecstatic about it. The feeling I had at that time was an unfamiliar feeling. It was like a heavy burden has been lifted off my shoulders.

God really is a God of the impossible. That was proven many times already in my life, and has been proven, yet again, by what had happened. I could not have passed the exam out of my own intelligence since admittedly, I hate science and have never shown interest about that subject from the first day I started schooling. That experience just validated how big my God is; bigger than my fears, my insecurities, and definitely bigger than the obstacles I meet in life.

Are some things impossible? Yes. But never to worry, we have a God of the impossible. He would stay that way until the end. I give back all the glory and honor unto Him who has been the source of everything I have.